Bread and Honey
by DarkSideOfTheLight
Summary: Young Francis Bonnefoy hates being a vampire. His fangs get in the way, he despises blood and he simply can't sleep during the day! Can a young ghost named Matthew help him with his troubles? Random one-shot, I hope you enjoy!


**Hello! This is only a fun little one-shot I have been thinking of doing since I read something as a child. I hope you enjoy this as much as I did-**

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><p>"It's no good," Said a sad voice from the local graveyard. A soft sniffle was heard from a young Frenchman sat on top of a grave, appearing rather disrespectful in the evening mist. "I just can't go on like this... There's no future in it!" He attempted to warm his cold hands beneath his cold armpits from the chilly August air. He shook his head, feeling a tear rolling down his cheek in distress. In fact, he was so upset he didn't even hear a young man walk-well, float- beside him.<p>

"What ever's the matter, Francis?" The young man said softly, his voice barely above a whisper, "You sound a bit depressed.."

"A bit!" The Frenchman huffed, "I couldn't be more depressed if I tried! I never wanted to be _this...They _talked me into this- _they _said i'd have all my days free, meet lots of interesting people and have no rent or living expenses...sounds idyllic, though not for a human..._they _didn't tell me i'd become a blood sucking _freak_!"_  
><em>

"Conned, were you?" Said the boy, floating above the ground. "At least you _had _that choice, i'm not a ghost by choice you know~" He gave a sympathetic smile, "It happens all the time...some people just can't be trusted." He paused, "I take it you don't like your new life then?"

"I hate it, I hate it!" Said Francis, emotions welling up in his expression. "I can't sleep during the day - never could - so I just lie there worrying; and then at night-time i'm good for nothing. I can barely get hold of enough blood to keep me going. I tell you, it's driving me insane. And it's not as if I like blood, either. Hate the stuff- gives me indigestion. I'd give anything for a nice mug of hot cocoa by a cosy fire!"

The young Vampire was beginning to enjoy himself - there's nothing like a sympathetic audience. "How do _you _manage?" He asked the ghostly boy, "I see you around at night, hearing others regard you by Matthew, but what do you do during the day? Hide in some grotty grave amongst the maggots?"

"Actually, no," Said the ghost. "People tend to not notice me during the day, so I get about quite a bit - go to the seaside or the country sometimes. Occasionally they complain of a chilly breeze as I go past; they mostly don't notice me at all."

The vampire began to sob.

"It's not fair! And there am I, shut up in that dreary coffin and I can't even see to read. What's the point of drinking this disgusting blood if all it does is keep me alive to drink some more? It's a hopeless existence."

"Have you ever considered a change of diet?" Suggested the ghost, Matthew. "I mean if you could get off this blood lust and start on bread and honey, or something wholesome like that -"

"What about these fangs then!" Grumbled the vampire in reply. "They're not designed for chewing things. Get in the way something terrible, they most certainly do!"

The vampire buried his face into his hands and took it out again quickly with a small yelp.

"Ouch!" Francis said quickly, rubbing a small hole in his palm. "See what I mean?"

"File them down," Said Matthew, who was getting rather bored with the whole subject. "File them down to match the others."

The vampire furrowed his brow in confusion.

"Have you got a file?" He asked, a long silence following and causing tension to grow.

"No," Said the ghostly boy, hovering just above the ground and obviously anxious to leave as soon as possible. "But there's one in the tool shed around the corner by the church tower. Good luck, Francis!"

With that, the ghostly boy Matthew vanished neatly and left a rather frustrated Frenchman behind.

"Show-off!" Said the vampire with a pout, "Magicians' tricks. Now-you-see-me-ow-you-don't. But...i'll give it an honest try... Anything's better than going on like this until the end of eternity." And with that, Francis got to his feet and stumbled off towards the tool shed, getting his long legs tangled up in his tattered winding sheet.

And so, dear reader, if you hear the sound of filing when you go past the churchyard after dark, you'll know what it is. And if you see somebody sitting by a cosy fire, drinking hot cocoa and eating bread and honey- Well...maybe!

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><p><strong>Completely random one-shot :3 I hope you guys enjoyed!<strong>


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